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All trends in moderation please
And I'll have a skinny, gluten-free, egg-white only, fat-free cheese omelette
Ball is life
But what if I'm from California?
Cheers to the only filter we'll ever need
Chivalry is buying your friends that are girls drinks
Consistent in his inconsistency
Crispy bud light
Defying gender stereotypes. One meal at a time.
Ew, he's calling me. What a psycho
False alarm. No one here is actually dying.
He keeps screenshotting all my snaps
I can't tell if he's the artist or probably just homeless
I deleted everything off my Instagram pre-mustache
I don't take advice from other people
I haven't swiped right since I met you
I rate my enjoyment of things
I'd like to *gracefully* become a shitfaced monster
I'll meet you guys there, I need to get my steps in
I'm an adult, I can make my own decisions
I'm confident, right guys?
I'm fifteen minutes away, this traffic is the worst
It tastes like we shouldn't have come here sober
Kanye! You made it!
Let us know when we can start eating
Let's talk about that all-caps email
Oh don't bother, we brought our own glassware
Pizza won't ignore your texts