9-5 Job

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Babe it needs to look more spontaneous

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But they don't have slim fit

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But what if I'm from California?

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Can't a guy read in peace anymore?

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Defying gender stereotypes. One meal at a time.

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Does the pork belly photograph well?

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Don't forget to stretch

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Dude my phone just died we have to go back

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Every morning I say to myselfie, today I will even

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Facebook: where your sloppy seconds are someone else's soulmate

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False alarm. No one here is actually dying.

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I agree sir, but this bullshit really motivates the millennials

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I call insta, you can have snapchat

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I haven't swiped right since I met you

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I make memes for a living

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I rate my enjoyment of things

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I'll meet you guys there, I need to get my steps in

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I'll start with the wifi password

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If you're on tinder

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If your selfie is only getting ten likes just delete it

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It just feels so us

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It'd be a whole lot cooler if there was service

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Lesson number one: Monetize your reposts

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Let America Swipe Again

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Let us know when we can start eating

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Meanwhile, in San Francisco

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Option A: Ghost him Option B: See him again

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Remember when you could watch the band?

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Rich in content, poor in data

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